


You’re the One

by leontina (Leontina)



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Community: hp_nextgen_fest, Drug Addiction, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, First Kiss, Getting Together, Harry Potter Next Generation, Light Angst, M/M, Mild Language, Recreational Drug Use, Smoking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-06
Updated: 2017-11-06
Packaged: 2019-01-19 15:41:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12413118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Leontina/pseuds/leontina
Summary: James is a good boy who wears bowties and listens to Buddy Holly, while Teddy is tattooed and pierced and plays in a punk band. As James starts to spend more time with Teddy he realises just how much trouble Teddy is in, and desperately tries to help him while falling harder and harder for his best friend.





	You’re the One

**Author's Note:**

> I loved this prompt, , and I hope you like what I’ve done with it. I listened to a lot of Buddy Holly while writing this and can honestly say I’m a massive fan of his now :D A few songs are hyperlinked in this so if you don’t know the songs or want to get a feel for the inspiration, have a listen :) Thank you to A for alpha/beta-reading for me ♥ 
> 
> I also made a moodboard for this fic: 

\- - - 

“Wee oo, I look just like [Buddy Holly](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kemivUKb4f4).”

“Oh oh, and you’re Mary Tyler Moore,” James sang back, grinning at Teddy who’d appeared in the doorway, leaning casually against the frame. 

Teddy grinned back at him, running a hand through his electric blue hair.

“I thought you said you were sticking with the purple,” James teased, ignoring the way his heart had jumped at the sight of Teddy ruffling his hair. 

“You know me, James,” Teddy retorted smoothly. “I’m always up for a bit of adventure. And talking of adventure… Am I looking at the newest Chaser for the Wimbourne Wasps?”

“Reserve Chaser,” James corrected, beaming. “But, yep, I’m an official Wasp now!”

“I knew you’d do it,” Teddy said proudly, pulling James into a hug and leaving one arm wrapped around his shoulders even after they pulled apart. “You’ll be sporting Hufflepuff colours, too!”

James snorted. “I thought you were too punk rock for school now,” he commented, looking down at Teddy’s torn t-shirt, skin-tight tartan jeans, and black Doc Martens pointedly. 

“Too punk for school, but not too punk for Hufflepuff,” Teddy responded with a wink. He swiped his lower lip with his tongue, showing off the bright pink metal of his tongue piercing. 

James swallowed heavily, shoving his hands in his pockets and flexing his fingers against the tight material of the fabric. Teddy was entirely _too_ attractive, and it was entirely unfair. 

Most of James’s older relatives thought that Teddy was unkempt, too wild, and viewed his many tattoos and piercings with disdain. James, on the other hand, had never seen anybody hotter. 

James’s own style was far more modest, with shirts and suspenders, and ankle grazer jeans; he adored the Muggle culture and fashion of the 1950s.

“Mum and Dad aren’t too happy with me,” James said, picking idly at the skin by his nails. “They’re thrilled I made it onto a professional Quidditch team, of course, but the season doesn’t start until February and they want me to work retail or something until then. But I’ve just finished Hogwarts! I think I’m entitled to a break, don’t you?”

Teddy nodded. “Absolutely! You know, when I told Nan I was quitting Healer training to focus on my band she went ballistic, but do you know how I got around that? I moved out so I didn’t have to listen to her complaining anymore. A few Howlers got through, but I could deal with that.”

“Move out?” James repeated, fixing Teddy with an amused look. “I have no money until February so where could I possibly go?”

“Come live with me, if you want,” Teddy said without skipping a beat, absently brushing his nose with the back of his hand. “I have a spare room and I always like a bit of company. Besides, I know you’d be a great roommate because you have so much of your own hair gel that you’d never need to steal mine.”

He reached out a hand to try and touch the quiff of James’s hair, but James ducked out of the way fast enough for Teddy to miss. 

“No touching my hair,” James said sternly.

Teddy grinned in response, raising his hands in defeat. “Oh so touchy. But what do you think? About living with me?”

Truthfully, James thought living with Teddy would be brilliant. They had always been close, and James trusted Teddy more than anyone else he knew. James considered Teddy his best friend, even if they hadn’t seen as much of each other while James had been away at school.

And of course living together meant more chance of accidentally catching a glimpse of Teddy coming out of the shower.

“I’ll move in with you on one condition.” James grinned. “ _You_ have to be the one to ask my mum.”

\- - - 

Teddy had been in bed for most of the morning, stating that band practice had kept him up late the night before, so James had his record player turned up to full volume, blasting Buddy Holly through the room. 

He loved vintage Muggle music, especially rockabilly and rock and roll. Buddy Holly was his absolute favourite, and he had been the reason James had taught himself how to play guitar.

James glanced over at his pride and joy, propped up in its guitar stand in the corner of his new room in Teddy’s apartment. It had just been nicely polished, and the surface of the guitar glinted in the sunlight that was streaming in through the window.

“Settling in alright?” Teddy asked, popping his head round the corner of the door. He stifled a yawn. “My neighbours will be wondering what’s happened to me; this music is very different to the type I usually blast.”

“I’m probably doing them a favour,” James laughed. He knew the music that Teddy had come to favour—loud, screeching guitars and screaming vocalists. “I might really ruin your reputation by putting on a bit of Frankie Valli next.”

“You wouldn’t!” Teddy gasped, clutching a hand to his chest. “You don’t happen to have anything of The Beatles do you?” 

“Of course I do,” James said, laughing as Teddy dropped to his knees to sift through James’s record collection. 

“Awesome!” Teddy exclaimed as he held a record high above his head. “I love The Clash!”

“I only bought it because you wouldn’t stop going on about them,” James said, rolling his eyes affectionately. “I’ve got the Sex Pistols somewhere in there too.”

“This is why you’re my favourite,” Teddy purred, smiling brightly and making James’s heart swoon. “Hey, you’re out of school now; why don’t you start a band too? You can play guitar _and_ sing.”

James shrugged. “I’m not much of a songwriter, so I prefer doing acoustic covers instead. Besides, the whole band scene isn’t really my thing.”

“Why don’t you at least come and watch my band during practice?” Teddy suggested eagerly. “I’ve told the guys about you and they really want to meet you; I bet you’ll love them.”

James flushed at the thought of Teddy talking to his bandmates about him, especially because Teddy hadn’t told James anything about _them_. 

“Sure,” James said. “I’ll come watch you practice.”

\- - - 

The garage Teddy and his band used for practice was in a rough Muggle neighbourhood, and looked just as grimy on the inside. The floor was sticky and stained, and empty beer bottles with labels in various states of being torn off lined the walls. The instruments were set up in front of a wall that was mostly covered by a large black flag with the anarchist logo spray-painted on in white, and the only lighting in the room came from various lines of Muggle fairy lights strung up.

It didn’t take long for James to remember why he wasn’t into the band scene, and he felt incredibly overdressed with his suspenders and bowtie. He fiddled with the blue fabric at his neck, suddenly feeling his face flush.

“Leave it.” Teddy smiled. “It looks cute.” 

James felt his face flush even more. 

“Hey, guys,” Teddy called out. “This is James; he’s watching us practice tonight.”

“Get the boy a leather jacket and we’ve got our very own James Dean.” One of the blokes laughed, his tone suggesting it was more mocking than friendly teasing.

“James is cool,” Teddy said, suggesting he’d picked up on the same thing. He threw an arm round James’s shoulder, and James felt a surge of pride run through him at Teddy’s defence. “Anyway, James, meet Xander, Davey, and Jude.”

“Hey, Jude.” James grinned, unable to help himself.

Jude groaned and rolled his eyes so hard, James thought they would fall right out. “I got tired of that joke by the time I was five. Never name your kids after a song,” he muttered as an afterthought.

Jude, who turned out to be the lead singer, had a bright green mohawk and more piercings than James could take in at once. While Teddy just had his tongue, snake bites, and the outer line of his left ear pierced, Jude had all of those plus a septum piercing, plugs in both his ears, and James suspected that the bulges in the sheer fabric of his white vest were nipple piercings.

Xander, the bassist, had no piercings as far as James could see but had two full sleeves of tattoos. He was a larger man with shoulder length hair, and a full beard that he’d split into two plaits. He looked like he was a very dedicated biker, clad in leather trousers and a leather vest over a skin-tight t-shirt.

Meanwhile the guitarist, Davey, was more like Teddy, with only a moderate amount of piercings and tattoos—at least compared to Jude and Xander—though he was still clad in tight, torn clothing like the others. 

All four of them fitted together perfectly, and James felt even more like an outsider as he watched Teddy join them by the instruments. Teddy may have called him cool, but the truth was James was clean cut and a typical _good boy_ , and nothing at all like Teddy and his friends.

James shook his head; he was usually a confident person, so he didn’t know why it bothered him so much whether he looked good in front of Teddy or not. 

Then again, he did know why—because if he faded into the background then Teddy would never see him as anything more than a friend. 

“Teddy!” James gasped as he watched Teddy take a cigarette off an offered carton, effectively ruining any hope he had of Teddy’s bandmates considering him cool. “You smoke? Don’t you know how bad for you they are?!”

The others laughed, rolling their eyes, while Teddy quickly made his way towards James.

“It chills me out before we play,” Teddy explained. “You won’t tell your dad, will you? Cigarettes aren’t all that bad in moderation. Besides,” he added when James pursed his lips disbelievingly, “you’re cool, Jamie, yeah?”

James felt his heart swell at Teddy’s words, and he could have swooned when Teddy called him Jamie. Nobody else ever called him that apart from Teddy; it was like their own little thing. 

“Nah, of course I won’t tell my dad,” James said, sure the others could hear the heavy drumming beneath his chest. “I’m not a snitch.”

“Oi, James Dean.” Jude grinned. “A bit of time with us and you’ll go right from being a Sandy to a Danny.”

“Fuck off,” Teddy mumbled around the cigarette in his mouth. “I always liked Sandy more anyway.”

He winked at James, who wondered if the blush would ever leave his cheeks. 

Teddy sat behind his drumkit, hair flashing from blue to red and green as he began a beat, and James wasn’t so worried about his blushing face—with any luck it would distract from the bulge in his trousers.

\- - - 

James crinkled his nose at the sterile smell of the tattoo parlour. 

Still, James supposed at least the place was clean, even if the scent of cleaning products and antiseptics was almost overwhelming. 

The man in the shop was tall, lean, bald, and seemed to have every inch of skin on his body covered in ink. 

“Teddy!” he exclaimed when he spotted them, beaming brightly. “What are you after this time? Or are you here for your friend?”

The tattooist looked James up and down eagerly, probably seeing him as some kind of blank canvas. While James thought Teddy looked awesome with his tattoos, James had to reluctantly admit to himself he was a bit of a wimp when it came to pain, and as far as he’d heard tattoos weren’t especially painless.

“Do you really think I could come in here and _not_ get some fresh ink?” Teddy laughed. “I want some swallows on my collar bones; I’ve drawn some designs for you. This is my friend James, by the way. James, this is Darius, my one and only.”

A stab of jealousy shot through James, and he could only manage a weak smile at the man.

“I’d be heartbroken if I heard you were seeing another tattooist,” Darius deadpanned. “Gimme your designs then and I’ll get them traced.”

Teddy took a seat in the reclining leather chair, tearing off his top and tossing it haphazardly over the stool by his side.

James tried not to stare at Teddy’s willowy form, or the dusty peaks of his nipples, or the trail of coarse hair going from under his belly button and down into the waistband of his plaid trousers…

James cleared his throat, turning his attention to the displays on the wall instead. Numerous photos of clients proudly showing off their tattoos looked back at him—various photos of Teddy were on show—and even—

“Professor McGonagall?” James gasped, staring wide-eyed at the scowling image of the headmistress reluctantly revealing the tiny cat tattoo on her upper arm.

“She used to terrify me at school,” Darius said as he appeared again. “Couldn’t believe it when she told me what she was here for.”

“Reckon we can talk Al into asking her about it next term?” Teddy suggested wickedly. 

“Probably; he seems to love getting detention,” James scoffed. “Usually for getting caught snogging Scorpius in broom closets, but still...”

James continued to look at the photos and display books of tattoo designs, determined not to look too closely at Darius’s close proximity to Teddy as he leaned close to him to do the tattoos. James knew he _had_ to be that close to do his job, and that he had no reason to be jealous, but James just couldn’t shake the sick feeling in his stomach.

“Why don’t you get one done?” Teddy asked, grunting slightly in discomfort as the buzzing of the tattoo needle started.

James turned back to Teddy, who had his hands by the sides of his head as he laid back on the now-flat chair, seeming relaxed despite his initial discomfort. He couldn’t help but stare, forgetting for a moment that Teddy had asked him something. 

“James?” Teddy prompted with a knowing grin. 

“Er, yeah, I don’t know,” James shrugged. “I wouldn’t know what to get.”

“You could get something old school; a real 1950s vibe to it,” Teddy suggested. “Or something to do with music? Oh, you’d look great with some ink, Jamie. Don’t you think he should go for it, Darius?”

“If he wants to,” Darius shrugged. “There’s no shame in saying no, because it’s a lifelong commitment. But if you fancy it, my wife’s in the back so she could work on you while I finish with Teddy.”

James’s heart leapt pleasantly at the mention of Darius having a wife.

“Oh?” he said, hoping nobody picked up on his too-high pitch. “I, er, I’m still not sure—”

“How about something for Buddy Holly?” Teddy cut in excitedly. “Buddy Holly glasses?”

James’s protest fell off his lips as he considered Teddy’s suggestion. He did _love_ Buddy Holly, and if Teddy thought that James would look _great_ with ink…

“Sure,” James said with a weak smile. “Why not?”

Admittedly, Darius’s wife Marina immediately put James at ease when she came out in a rockabilly dress and Bettie Page hairdo, and chatted with him about Elvis Presley while he gritted his teeth against the feeling of the needle. It wasn’t particularly painful like he’d thought it might be, but was more uncomfortable than anything. 

Half an hour later James had a tattoo of Buddy Holly’s glasses inked into the skin on his inner forearm, so he could hold his arm up above his eyes and have the glasses perfectly in place. 

“That looks brilliant,” Teddy beamed, fingers gingerly touching James’s arm as he studied the design. “Told you you’d look great.”

James nodded, swallowing heavily at the feel of Teddy’s fingers on his sensitive skin. 

He could still feel Teddy’s touch long after Teddy let go.

\- - - 

“Go on,” Davey urged, rustling the cigarette carton at James. “How can you say you don’t like smoking if you’ve never tried it?”

“Fuck off away from him.” Teddy laughed, striding over to them and snatching the carton from Davey’s hands. “I don’t have to show you those Muggle posters about peer pressure, do I?”

“You’re a twat, Teddy, and your James Dean daydream is a goody goody.” Davey grinned, shoving Teddy’s shoulder roughly. “More cigs for me, anyway.”

James had been to a few of the band practices now, and he still wasn’t sure how he felt about Teddy’s bandmates. He got the impression that they didn’t like him, but they didn’t seem to like each other either; they were always rough-housing and insulting each other, but seemed to have each others’ backs as well. 

And truthfully, James didn’t think the band members were particularly good people.

While James had been considered a troublemaker at school, it had been because he joked around too much and didn’t focus on his schoolwork. Aunt Hermione had taken him for tests when he’d been younger which confirmed he was Dyslexic, but Hogwarts never put in any means to help him and because he’d struggled with the reading he’d been forced to find other ways to entertain himself in class. 

But he’d never smoked, never got into fights, and never stolen anything. James was a joker but he was what people considered a good boy—Albus was the problematic son, but even his mood swings looked innocent compared to the people Teddy hung around with. 

Teddy liked them, though, so James wasn’t going to say anything—he wasn’t a wet rag. 

“Hey, guys!” Jude announced cheerfully as he entered the room, waving a plastic bag above his head. “Let’s cut practice tonight; lookie what I’ve got!”

James’s eyes widened at the sight of the white powder in the bag. Cigarettes were one thing, but if that powder was what James thought it was…

“Shit, I forgot we had Sandy as a groupie. Teddy, chill him out, will you?” Jude said, rather more denounced as he jerked his head towards James.

“You alright, Jamie?” Teddy asked, swiping his nose with the back of his hand. 

“No, I’m not alright,” James huffed, staring in shock as he watched Jude pour the powder onto a table and proceed to shift it into neat lines. “Teddy are you—? Is that _cocaine_?”

Teddy nodded “Yeah. It’s—”

“What?” James gasped. “Please tell me _you_ don’t—”

“I dabble.” Teddy shrugged. “I know it looks bad, but it’s really not. We’re not addicts or anything; it’s just a bit of fun.”

“But it’s cocaine!” James protested, folding his arms over his chest.

“No shit,” Xander muttered before he leant over the table to snort one of the lines. 

“James,” Teddy purred, throwing an arm around James’s shoulder. James tried to pull away, nausea lying heavy in his stomach, but Teddy held him tightly. “It’s really not all that bad; loads of people on the band scene are into it. We’re not taking it to cope with life or any shit like that, it’s just for fun. Besides, I promised the guys they could trust you. You won’t let me down, will you, Jamie?” 

“I won’t tell on you, if that’s what you mean,” James huffed. “But I don’t want to _see_ you doing it.”

“Close your eyes then,” Teddy offered with a grin, but James didn’t smile back. “Oh, Jamie, don’t worry about me; I know what I’m doing. It’s cute that you care but everything’s fine, I promise. Hey, why don’t you pick up Davey’s guitar and play us some songs? Play me a bit of Elvis?”

James snorted and shook his head sadly. “Sing music of somebody who died from a drug overdose while you and your mates do drugs?”

“He did prescription drugs,” Teddy argued. “Come on, Jamie, just trust me, okay?”

James sighed, nodding reluctantly. “Fine,” he muttered darkly, unable to meet Teddy’s vibrant blue gaze. “Just, try not to die, yeah?”

Teddy tugged James into a one armed hug, breathing deeply into his hair. “You’re the best, James. Remember, you’ve always been my favourite.” 

\- - - 

Teddy wouldn’t get out of bed on Sunday morning. 

For over a year now, just after he’d quit Healer training, Teddy turned up late to Sunday dinners with the family and usually eventually arrived in a foul mood. It suddenly made sense to James as to _why_ , and it made him feel ill to think that Teddy had been into drugs for at least a year, unnoticed by all of them. 

Piercings and tattoos were one thing, cigarettes another, but cocaine was something different all together. The body modifications made James find Teddy even hotter, the cigarettes made James frown and roll his eyes, but the drugs...James didn’t know what he was supposed to do. 

He certainly wasn’t going to tell anyone because he couldn’t betray Teddy like that, especially when Teddy had told James how much faith he had in him. He knew it was wrong, but Teddy’s affection made James feel good about himself and he craved that feeling. Besides, nobody else would understand Teddy like James did. 

James knew that Teddy had fallen in with a bad crowd, and that despite his bad boy image he could still be soft and gentle—at least around James. Others might look at Teddy as a bad influence and a lost cause and try and lock him away somewhere, and James couldn’t be responsible for taking away Teddy’s freedom when he knew how much it meant to him. 

“James!” His mother greeted happily when he turned up at his childhood home alone. “I’ve missed you.”

“I saw you last week,” James grumbled, wincing as he was pulled into a hug. “I know it must be hard to see your favourite child go, but it’s really not fair on Albus and Lily to shower me with so much affection.”

Ginny shoved James’s shoulder lightly. “Come in, you! Where’s Teddy?”

“Sleeping in,” James said as he stepped through to the living room to meet the rest of his family.

“Good Saturday night, then?” His father grinned. “Oi!” he added, turning to Albus and Scorpius who were starting to get a little too handsy. “You’re not in a broom closet anymore. Merlin, any more letters from McGonagall and…”

James laughed, but his heart wasn’t in it. 

He loved his family, of course, but he’d always been left to his own devices. Lily was the youngest, the only girl, and had her parents wrapped around her little finger, while Albus was the troubled child who’d been through a long line of therapists but still found himself in trouble constantly. James, on the other hand, was the eldest son who’d always been popular and done well for himself, the model Gryffindor son. His grades weren’t great but his behaviour mostly was—where it counted, at least—and he’d never been a source of trouble for his parents.

It therefore didn’t feel right to bring his woes to his family, even if he wanted to. James was living with Teddy now, so it was his problem to deal with, not anyone else’s. 

“Hey, James!” Lily cried eagerly during dinner, while he was passing the peas to Albus. “What’s that on your arm?”

James cringed. He’d rolled his sleeves up just a little bit for dinner, purposely keeping his tattoo hidden, but evidently the fabric had shifted and now black ink was visible on his skin.

“Nothing!” James hissed, quickly tugging his sleeve down, but he knew it was too late.

“It was a tattoo, wasn’t it?!” Lily asked, bouncing in her seat. “Let us see! Mum, are you going to kill him?”

James glanced at his parents, who were both watching him with a frown.

“Go on, James,” Albus urged. “I want to see, too.”

James sighed, rolling up his sleeve. “Buddy Holly, of course,” he explained with a shaky grin. “It looks cool, don’t you think?”

“Sure,” Ginny said, voice strained. “You just never struck me as the tattoo type.”

“Actually,” came Teddy’s voice from the doorway. “It was my idea. Sorry I’m late.”

“Don’t worry,” Harry murmured. “But before we sit, can I borrow you for a second, Teddy? I need to have a quiet word with you.”

Teddy nodded, and caught James’s eye and winked. 

Uncomfortable silence settled around them with Harry and Teddy gone, and James stabbed idly at his potato, shifting it around his plate but not actually eating it. When Harry and Teddy finally returned Teddy took a seat beside James, knocking James’s knee with his own. 

“Don’t look so worried, it was fine,” Teddy said lowly so only James could hear him. “Got a bit of a ‘I’m not mad, just disappointed’ talk, but honestly, Jamie, I’d suffer through anything for you.”

James felt his cheeks flush, and he jostled his thigh against Teddy’s next to him. 

“Thanks, Teddy,” he murmured. “You’re not so bad.”

\- - - 

James clutched his drink tightly, leaving circular smudges in the condensation on the glass. His hand covered the top of it instinctively as somebody jostled into him, not even turning around to apologise to him. 

The small nightclub was packed with people, all Muggles, who had eagerly turned up to support local punk bands. Teddy’s band would be playing at some point in the night, but James hadn’t been allowed to go backstage with them.

The bands were technically good, he supposed, but the music style wasn’t one he cared for. The crowd around him evidently disagreed, jumping up and down with their arms in the air, singing along when a cover song was played. 

James mumbled along to the cover songs; he didn’t know the words, but the music was loud enough that nobody would be able to hear his muttered attempts. The atmosphere was lively, at least, and though he hadn’t had that much to drink, the alcohol was buzzing in James’s veins. 

It was finally Teddy’s band’s turn to perform, and they came on stage to a rousing round of applause. James pushed his way through the crowd as the first song started, managing to only get a little bit of drink spilled on him as he made it the front. 

His eyes were instantly drawn to Teddy, who, despite being hidden behind his drumkit, looked bright with passion and pride. The band had never performed in front of an audience before, and Teddy couldn’t stop talking about the concert for days, not once seeming nervous.

Teddy looked like he belonged on stage, revelling as he was in the delighted response from the crowd. He was grinning widely, eyes sparkling under the bright lights shining above him. Teddy was beautiful, and James knew then, unaware of everything else around him _but_ Teddy, that his feelings were more than just simple attraction.

Teddy’s gaze caught his across the stage, and his grin only grew, hands almost a blur as he beat wildly on the drums. 

“And now,” a sweaty Jude shouted to the crowd. “Let’s play you a bit of classic punk for our hometown— _[London Calling](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EfK-WX2pa8c)_.”

James cheered along with the crowd, singing along confidently for the first time that night. He and Teddy had listened to The Clash so often together since James had moved in, that they felt like _their_ band.

“‘ _Cause London is drowning, and I live by the river_ ,” James sang, hands waving in the air.

Teddy jumped down into the crowd after their set had finished, shaking off people patting him on the back as he hurried towards James, pulling him into a tight hug.

“How did I do?” Teddy shouted over the noise of the next band, still beaming ear-to-ear.

“You were brilliant,” James shouted back, grabbing Teddy’s hand. “Let’s go…”

James led Teddy through the crowd, who parted readily when they saw it was Teddy walking through them. James found a booth near the back of the crowd, and stealthily threw up a noise-dimming charm so they could hear themselves over the music.

“That was so great!” Teddy enthused. “Don’t you think it went great? Man, I am so fucking _pumped_ right now.”

James frowned. Looking at how blown Teddy’s pupils were, he had a feeling Teddy’s good feelings weren’t entirely linked to playing on stage. 

He forced himself to smile. “How much did you take?” he asked, voice strained in his attempt to sound casual.

“Not much,” Teddy answered, wiping his nose with the back of his hand. James could see tiny specks of white on Teddy’s knuckles when his hand came away. “Had to be energetic for the crowds, yeah? Did you like it, Jamie?”

James reached for Teddy’s hand, stroking the back of it softly with his thumb.

“Yeah,” James said. “I loved you—it. I loved it.”

\- - - 

“Hey,” Teddy murmured sleepily, dropping onto the sofa besides James and resting his head on James’s shoulder. “My head hurts, Jamie.”

“Cocaine comedown,” James said bluntly, but his expression softened when Teddy pouted. “I’ll go get you some water.”

When he returned Teddy was resting his head in his hands, rubbing his forehead slowly. 

“Here,” James said gently, passing the glass over to him. “You look like shit.”

“Thanks,” Teddy snorted, taking the water and downing it. “Can we just… _chill_ today. I know what you’re going to say, and yeah, I know I deserve all this for doing the coke in the first place, but my head hurts and I feel sad, and I don’t want to be even more reminded of how disappointed you are in me.”

“I’m not disappointed in you,” James answered, sitting beside Teddy and wrapping his arm around him. “I just worry about you, that’s all. But how about we watch a movie? Order a pizza later?”

“Sounds good,” Teddy smiled. “You’re the best, James, you know that? What movie are we watching? If you say Blue—”

“Blue Hawaii, yes, that’s what we’re watching,” James laughed. “It’s Elvis Presley in _Hawaii_ ; what’s not to love?”

“It is a lovable movie,” Teddy agreed. “But it’s a bit less lovable after seeing it Merlin knows how many times.” He grinned. “When did we first watch it together?”

“It was just before you went to Hogwarts,” James answered. “You were just eleven, so I must have been four.”

“Do you remember when we made Albus watch it with us for the first time and convinced him we were going to ship _him_ off to Hawaii afterwards?” Teddy laughed, settling his head back on James’s shoulder.

“I don’t know why he was so upset!” James exclaimed. “I’d love to go to Hawaii!”

Teddy smiled up at him tenderly “We’ll have to go sometime. I know we always said we would, but then Hogwarts got in the way and we never got to go there, _or_ Graceland. When my band gets me rich and famous I’m gonna treat you, Jamie.” 

“I’d like that,” James said, although if he couldn’t go to Hawaii he’d be perfectly content to sit with Teddy in his arms instead. “Just me and you, yeah?”

“Just me and you,” Teddy agreed, sitting up much to James’s disappointment. “We’ve always been a good pair.”

“Better than most pairs, I’d wager.” James grinned, the smile falling from his face when Teddy used his finger to tilt James’s chin towards him. Teddy’s eyes were pale green, his natural colour, and his lips were rosy red, ever so slightly parted. “Teddy…”

Teddy closed the gap between them, his lips moving gently over James’s. 

James froze and Teddy pulled back, swallowing hard and looking at him uncertainly. “James, did I—?”

James surged forwards, his mouth meeting Teddy’s as they fell back onto the sofa, James’s straddling Teddy’s hips.

Teddy’s arms came up to clutch James’s shoulders as their kiss deepened, lips moving seamlessly together. 

They broke apart when the need for air became too much, and James looked down into Teddy’s adoring gaze, heart aching with how much he wanted Teddy; how much he wanted to _help_ him. 

He didn’t think he could deal with thinking about that right now, so James leaned down and kissed Teddy again, losing himself in his warm embrace.

\- - - 

James sat on the tatty, torn armchair in the band’s garage, strumming a Gene Vincent song on his guitar. 

Teddy and his bandmates weren’t playing themselves yet; Xander was late, and the other three were arguing over song lyrics.

“They’re shit, mate, sorry.” Jude shrugged, shoving the paper against Davey’s chest. “Leave the writing to me and Teddy.”

“Like you’ve never written anything shit,” Davey spat back. “What did you think, Teddy?”

“Eh,” Teddy murmured, holding his hands up in surrender. “I’ve heard better but it was good for a first attempt. With a bit of work we could make something of it.”

“Oh, not good enough for you either, is it?” Davey scowled.

“At least he’s offering a solution,” Jude argued. “Maybe you’re the one nothing’s ever good enough for.”

James tried to drown their argument out, focusing on the song he was playing and allowing the notes of the guitar to carry him away— _[Be Bop a Lula](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O4_5593-skQ)_ , one of the best rock and roll songs of all times, in James’s opinion. 

He jumped when a hand touched his shoulder, and stopped strumming the strings. He turned to meet Teddy’s dark grey gaze; a sure sign he was angry. 

“You have the right idea, playing alone,” Teddy muttered, sliding onto the floor and resting his head against James’s knees. “Beats having to deal with bastards like these guys.”

“James Dean ain’t going to fix you, Teddy,” Jude stated coldly. “You’re as fucked up as the rest of us, just own that.”

“Did I hear talk of being fucked up?” Xander said as way of greeting as he finally arrived at practice. “Merlin, what’s wrong with you lot? Whatever; I’ve got just the thing to cheer you up.”

“Thank fuck,” Davey muttered as Xander held a bag of cocaine high above his head.

James felt Teddy shift against his legs, and he leaned down to touch Teddy’s shoulder in response.

“Please don’t,” James murmured softly as Teddy looked at him uncertainly. “You don’t need that stuff, Teddy, yeah?”

Teddy glanced between James and his bandmates, brow furrowed with apprehension. 

“Today’s been shit, sorry, Jamie,” Teddy finally said, scrambling to his feet and leaving James feeling cold. “I... Sorry.”

James couldn’t face playing an upbeat song anymore. 

He eventually forced himself to play _[More Than I Can Say](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LUTa2IcUJtA)_ instead.

“ _Why don’t you know I need you so?_ ” James sang. “... _Do you mean to make me cry? Am I just another guy?_ ”

Teddy was too high to notice.

\- - - 

“It’s quiet in here,” came Teddy’s voice from the doorway of James’s bedroom. “Normally you have music playing.”

James spared him a glance and shrugged. “Don’t fancy the noise. You probably don’t either, what with the comedown and all.”

His words came out harsher than intended, and Teddy winced. 

James didn’t mean to hurt Teddy; he wasn’t _angry_ at him, he was just tired. All he could see was Teddy spiralling out of control and James being helpless to stop. 

He’d even considered going to his dad but decided against it in the end. James didn’t know what the laws for taking cocaine were, and while he doubted his dad would arrest Teddy that would cause later problems—if someone found out the Head Auror had ignored his godson’s crimes to spare him jail…

“I don’t hate you, Teddy,” James pressed on, unable to stand the silence any longer. “I’m not pissed off; I just...you need help. You need to _admit_ you need help, and I can’t force you to do that. I love being around you, Teddy, but not when you’re high.”

Teddy sighed, sinking onto the edge of James’s bed and burying his face in his hands. 

“I know, I know,” he murmured softly. “I just—I keep fucking up, I know that, Jamie. I had a year left of Healer training but I quit because the coke was messing me up for my shifts, and I convinced myself it was a good thing because I could focus on my band. And honestly, life sucks when I’m sober. But you...you’re the only good thing in my life that I’ve got left and I don’t want to drive you away.”

“I don’t want you to drive me away, either,” James said, rubbing his hand along Teddy’s knee. “I want you to be okay, but that’s down to you, yeah?”

“I don’t know if I know how to be okay,” Teddy uttered, looking up from his hands to fix James with a wild gaze. “I’m putting too much on you, James, I’m sorry.”

“No,” James soothed gently. “You need to talk to somebody; I’m glad you trust me.”

“Of course I trust you. I trust you more than _anybody_ ,” Teddy urged. “You mean… _everything_ to me.”

Teddy reached desperately for James’s hands, his own trembling violently. 

James leaned in, resting his forehead against Teddy’s, their noses brushing. Teddy’s skin was cold but somehow it soothed James. 

Teddy’s arms wrapped round James, holding him tightly.

“You’ll get through this,” James murmured confidently. “You’re going to get through this, I promise. Remember I love you, no matter what, yeah? But you’ve got to promise you’ll try; make an effort for me. Please, Teddy.”

Teddy sighed softly. “I promise.”

Teddy closed the gap between them, pressing their lips together softly at last. James found himself being pressed backwards onto the bed, and he allowed Teddy to take control, knowing he needed it. James clutched at Teddy’s shoulders when he finally pushed inside him, whispering words of praise and love and affection. 

James felt nothing but warmth and bliss, and hoped Teddy felt the same. 

\- - - 

James knew he told Teddy that he’d support him, and that he wasn’t angry at him, but when James went to the band’s garage late one night and found Teddy and the others high, he couldn’t stop the rage bubbling inside him.

“Jamie!” Teddy declared upon seeing him, running over and pulling him into an uncomfortably tight hug. “I missed you!”

James pulled out of Teddy’s grasp, scowling as he looked into Teddy’s gaze, his pupils blown so wide there was only a narrow circle of colour around them. The colour kept changing, flashing from green to blue to violet—when Teddy’s Metamorphmagus abilities began to lose control it was a sure sign Teddy had taken more than just a small dose of cocaine. 

“I bet you didn’t even try to say no, did you?” James muttered darkly, folding his arms over his chest.

Teddy frowned. “Why are you angry? You told me before you wouldn’t be angry. You don’t need to be; I know _exactly_ what I’m doing, James. I’m in perfect control of everything in my life.”

James rolled his eyes. “Amazing how confident cocaine makes you feel, even though you were almost crying about how shitty everything is while you were sober.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Teddy declared proudly. “I have a great band, a hot boyfriend—” he reached out to slap James’s arse, making him jump back at the sting of pain “—and I have _fun_. You should have fun with us too, Jamie! We could go get matching tattoos! Let’s go get matching tattoos!”

He grabbed James’s wrist and tried to lead him away, but James dug his feet firmly into the ground. 

“Let _go_ of me,” James hissed, yanking his wrist free. “I can’t keep doing this, Teddy. I can only do so much to help you, and if you refuse to help yourself I don’t know how much longer I can stay by your side. For _fuck’s_ sake, Teddy!”

“Oo, listen to our little James Dean swearing over there,” Davey cackled. “Our Sandy might just be becoming a Danny.”

“Shut up!” James hissed. “I blame you lot for all this.”

“You trying to start something, mate?” Jude asked aggressively, stumbling to his feet with his fists barred but falling back down as Xander tugged at his sleeve. “Whatever, I don’t care.”

James rolled his eyes, turning back to Teddy who didn’t look upset, just rather confused. It was no use trying to make a point while Teddy was high, that much was evident.

“I’m going to stay with my parents for a couple of days,” James said, heart clenching in his chest. “Just, try not to die while I’m gone, yeah?”

\- - - 

When James finally returned to the apartment he shared with Teddy he found it empty. It was a Friday night, so James could only assume that Teddy had gone out with his bandmates again. 

He sighed, opening the door to his bedroom and jumping when his eyes immediately landed on a figure on his bed. He soon realised it was Teddy, curled on top of the duvet with James’s Gryffindor hoodie draped across him.

Teddy glanced up when he heard James enter, his green eyes red-rimmed. His hair was its natural dark brown colour, and James couldn’t remember the last time he had seen Teddy without a head of vibrantly coloured hair. 

He felt a tug of pain in his heart, guilt rushing through him at seeing Teddy’s sorry state. James didn’t regret going to his parents house because the break from Teddy had done him good, but evidently it hadn’t been as refreshing for Teddy.

“I quit the band,” Teddy croaked, sitting up and allowing James’s hoodie to fall into his lap where he curled his fingers around it. “They were all dickheads and I can make better music without them.”

“Oh, Teddy,” James soothed, sitting beside him on the bed. “I know you loved that band.”

“I did,” Teddy agreed mournfully. “But those guys are as fucked up as I am, and together we only encourage that. I know I need to change; I realised while I was coming down how much I’ve hurt people I care about. I drove you away, and that was only after putting you through all my shit, and I’ve barely spoken to Nan in this last year and I know it’s breaking her heart. I’m an asshole, Jamie, and I’m not saying that because I want you to tell me it’s not true. I’m an asshole, but I can still change, yeah?”

“There’s always time to change,” James answered softly. “But you know it’s all down to you? Nobody else can make you give up drugs; it has to be your choice. If you want...when you’re ready...we could go and see somebody professional? I’ll go with you, if you want me there.”

“I...maybe,” Teddy said. “It’s one thing talking about it with you, you know, but admitting I have a prob—admitting the truth to somebody else makes everything seem too real and I don’t know if I can handle that right now. But I know I should; Davey tried to quit cold turkey once and he ended up in hospital after he tried to overdose on potions.”

“It’s your choice, Teddy,” James murmured. “But I’ll support you either way.”

“You’re the best, Jamie,” Teddy soothed, dropping his head to James’s shoulder. “I really don’t deserve you, but you’ve stuck by me regardless.”

“Of course you deserve me,” James said tenderly. “You’re not a bad guy, Teddy; you just fell into a bad place. But you’re gonna get out of there, I promise.” 

“Thank you...for everything,” Teddy said. “I swear I’m gonna try this time, James, I swear it. Do you think...will you play me a song?”

James smiled, standing up to get his guitar. 

Teddy moved into a cross-legged position on the bed, and James sat opposite him on his return, mirroring him. 

“Your favourite one?” James offered, strumming the first notes of _[Let it Be](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ih-8K1a_SsA)_.

Teddy closed his eyes as James sang, a look of contentment washing over his face as his hair slowly started to shift to a vivid pink shade. 

“ _And when the night is cloudy, there is still a light that shines on me. Shine until tomorrow, let it be_.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! You can show your appreciation for the author in a comment here or on [livejournal](https://hp-nextgen-fest.livejournal.com/115945.html).


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